Queries: Round Four

Got a rejection from Mr. Christopher Schelling this week. In my query I'd congratulated him and Augusten Burroughs on their recent marriage, briefly mentioning mine saying I'd hope they were enjoying married life as much as I am. I mentioned how I'd hope he'd seen some similarities to Eleanor & Park by Rainbow Rowell (one of his authors). This was before Richard Florest had compared the manuscript, after having read it, to that book. So hopefully I'm on to something here.

Here's Mr. Schelling's kind response:  

"Thanks so much for sending your novel - and for your kind words on my marriage. (Congratulations on yours. We're ridiculously happy too.) There's a lot to like here, especially how you capture the emotions so clearly. I see why Eleanor & Park would be a comparison, but..." and it goes on from there.

And instead of talking about that but, I'd much rather talk about this one (I love talking about buts): I was bummed to receive Mr. Schelling's rejection this week, BUT was thrilled to receive a SASE back in the mail yesterday from none other than John Green's agent, Ms. Jodi Reamer at Writer's House. I was teaching a 20th Century American Drama night class, and by teaching I mean watching the Dustin Hoffman/John Malkovich Death of a Salesman  holding back tears in front of my students, when my wife messaged me on Facebook. Previously I'd been very ceremonious about query responses: Don't open the email until after you're home and have had dinner; Don't let your wife open the SASE if you're not home; Finish x number of student registrations before opening it at work. I decided I was probably jinxing myself. So I told Jessa to open the envelope and message me whatever it said right then and there. If I was going to cry in front of my students anyway, I might as well have a better reason than it being a real darn shame Biff had to burn those sneakers after he flunked math.

Ms. Reamer, who had received the first 10 pages with my initial query requested the first 50ish. So a once over of those 50 pages, selecting a good breaking point, and emailing the requested file on was how I spent my lunch break. And then I even had time left over to query Tom Perrotta's agent, mostly because Jessa and I realized that both my book and his Little Children feature disturbing masturbation scenes. And what else could an agent possibly be looking for than that?

Maybe one day my book can be turned into a movie with sexy, sexy people in it too. 

On an unrelated note, Jessa and I discovered we'd "made it" this week when our Google alerts pointed us to this article on citations: "How to Cite Large Sections of a Poem."

Despite our book, The Way We Sleep  having no poetry in it, the author, Adam Jefferys chose to use us, of all multiple editors of all volumes of anything ever published, as the example for how to cite a volume with multiple editors: "For a poem from an anthology, include the editor's name or names after the book's title, preceded by "Ed." For example: Ed. C. James Bye and Jessa Bye."

So yeah, it's been a good week. 

Update: I completely forgot until Jessa mentioned it that Ms. Reamer is also Bruce "Ash" Campbell's agent!

First Manuscript Request Rejected (Queries Round Four)

Sunday I queried Mr. Richard Florest of Rob Weisbach Creative Management. This is the agency that represents Brad Meltzer (who wrote one of my favorite comics of the last decade, Identity Crisis), not to mention Jon Stewart and a slew of big name celebrities. This was a hail Mary on my part, but as I mentioned before, in the early stages of querying, I'm aiming big and throwing the spaghetti at the wall to seeing what sticks here. Plus the agency is focused on developing careers, and in their submission guidelines they even asked to hear about future projects and overall career goals, which really appealed to me.

Needless to say, I was shocked when Mr. Florest responded less than 48 hours later asking to see the manuscript. He did mention he wasn't crazy about More Like a Siren, Less Like a Bell as a title, but if I wasn't married to that, he thought it sounded like a really exiting project. I do love the title, but the book has had other titles in in various draft stages (including "Glib" and "Loretta's Scars" after the Pavement song, seeing as the main character, Loretta, actually goes to see the band near the end of the novel and the whole thing is about little events that have messed her up in one way or another).

So I sent the manuscript and yesterday got what I can only imagine is one of the most encouraging rejections ever emailed. 

He starts, "I tend to glance at the first few lines of every manuscript, only rarely setting aside the day's business to read (in this industry reading, I'm sure you've heard, happens at night, on weekends, etc.). Well, your story has a strange pull, and it proved to be one of those rare instances." So some nice ego-stroking there. At least this gives me an idea that my query letter is doing what it's supposed to.

He continues, "You have literary chops but a knack for pacing and tension that I'd typically associate with a gifted writer of suspense. And there are elements of the story that have settled under my skin in ways both pleasing and disconcerting." Okay, hugely complimentary and then that tiny, tiny pause for consideration in that word "disconcerting." I'm reading and praying, maybe it's something he thinks we can work through?

"So, then, know that I think you have the seed for something great here--I just think it needs to evolve quite a bit more before it's ready for publishers."

Tear.

He goes on to explain how, although he's a big believer in young audiences "reading-up," the content in the book may be too dark for YA. I've considered this myself, though have been encouraged to submit as YA from writing friends and in a writing consultation with First Blood  author, David Morrell. I've also been concerned about the book starting with an eight-year-old protagonist told by a third person narrator whose voice remains, throughout the book, mostly consistent with the grown, twenty-two-year-old version of that protagonist who we see in the majority of the book. Mr. Florest mentioned this "seemed to me a disconnect between the controlling narrative perspective and Loretta (and then, by extension, the primary intended audience for the book)." With the narrator's "concerns, perspective, sophistication (and then eventually the arc of the story)--too often it just didn't read YA to me."

So for a brief moment I started stressing myself out about how I might address these concerns in a rewrite, and would I even be able to, and am I a decent enough writer to make this stupid book even work?!? And then my confidence was restored in the next paragraph: "...As I read in spots I was reminded of some very successful stories: Mathilda Savitch, Eleanor & Park, a little bit of The Lovely Bones, even one of George Saunders' short stories. And maybe someone else will see a way with it in its current form. Regardless, good luck, and thanks again for giving me a shot."

A big time agent. Just compared me. To George. Freaking. Saunders. 

Review: Cute Stripey Cardigan for Twenty Bucks

Cute Stripey Cardigan

Cute Stripey Cardigan for Twenty Bucks 

Two for Twee Records/MPDG Ltd.; 2009

Cute Stripey Cardigan's third album in as many years is a response to the age-old question, "If squirrels could write music, what would it sound like?" The lyrics to album opener, "You are Adorable, I am Adorable (We are Adorable Together)," offers a glimpse into the life of an organic, lemon-poppy seed cupcake that has fallen devastatingly in love with a broken-spined, first-print copy of The Tale of Mrs. Tiggy-Winkle and features glistering, peanut-brittle guitars, a string quintet, and harmonies sung by three of the original surviving Ewoks. The final lines, delivered from the point of view of the weary copy of the Beatrix Potter classic--"My little Poppy/You make me so sleepy/But you are a sweetie/You know how to read me"--provide proof that the two will survive all of the relationship hiccups presented in the preceding verses.

Speaking of hiccups, second track, "Get Up! Get Up! And Dance to Your Hiccups!" is a rollicking delight dedicated to the recent YouTube craze of tweens posting videos of themselves downing bottles of Jones Cola and then ecstatically dancing herky-jerk to the beat of their or their friends' hiccups. The track also includes a ukelele solo by the ghost of the eternally darling, Spanky of The Little Rascals. Brilliantly stark closing track, "Let's Tint Everything Just a Little Bit Yellow," is simply an audio recording of a daffodil digitally sped up by 1,500% so that the listener can experience its emergence from seed to blooming flower in a mere three minutes and twenty-two seconds.

It's great to see that Cute Stripey Cardigan have landed on their penny-loafer and Mary Janes wearing feet following the sophomore slump of previous record, We Like Books and Milk. Fans of Manchester's The Sunday Picnics, early Scratch N' Sniff Stickers, and actual scratch 'n sniff stickers will fall head over heels for Cute Stripey Cardigan for Twenty Bucks.

RATING: 5/5 Fluffy Baby Chickadees